We are Still Alive

I never guessed we would be so bad at keeping this thing up. I have been VERY busy due to some changes at work and Tami has yet to even learn how to long into this thing. That combination doesn't bode well for us trying to keep up with it.

The great news on the adoption front is that we switched agencies and within two weeks our home study was approved. With our old agency it took nearly 3 weeks to find out that they had received and were starting to look at our home study. Just yesterday we received the dossier packet so we can start working on this most important of paper chases. We thought the first paper chase was involved. Well, let me tell you it was nothing compared to what is required for the dossier.

On the family front we are doing well. I took on a different role at work that also includes some additional responsibilities. It is short term due to the AT&T Wireless acquisition of us but it will bring some additional money and that is why I chose to do it. I didn't expect it to be as crazy and stressful as it has been, but it is just temporary.

The kids are all doing great. We have had a nasty little cold running through our house that seems to take forever to get over. The big kids are doing great in school and the little boys continue to be full of energy. Needless to say they are all psyched for the gift opening season that goes through this next week.

So please keep us in your prayers as we get through this dossier process. If the timeline of our agency stays where it is now, it is possible that we could hear something by next Christmas. That is exciting!

Making the Change

We have officially decided to change agencies. We couldn't deal with up to a 24 month wait at CHSFS. They are a great agency and we were happy with the contact we had with them, it is simply too long to wait.
We are moving to Adoption Advocates International (AAI)out of Port Angeles, WA. AAI is also a very reputable agency that does great humanitarian work in Ethiopia and they actually require all of their families to support their efforts in Ethiopia once the adoption goes through. We have experienced a very high level of service during the initial question asking phase so we are pleased thus far.
We sent our application to them today for over night delivery. Our social worker with Catholic Charities has already spoken with them and sent them a copy of our home study. So hopefully that will mean we fly right through this application process and get on to our dossier which is what we were getting ready to start with CHSFS anyway. So we don't lose any time in the process on the front end and we will be dealing with a 6-9 month wait once we get done with the dossier.
So all is good on the Koesters front. We are ready to start the holidays. Happy Thanksgiving!!

Changing Agencies

We have decided to change agencies. Although there was a lot to like about CHSFS, they recently increased their wait times to up to 2 years for a referral. When we first inquired the average wait time was around a year. So we began to look at other agencies and realized the wait time wasn't nearly that long elsewhere.
So we started looking for a new agency that had the right accreditation along with a history in Ethiopia that includes humanitarian efforts. We have settled on Adoption Advocates International which is located in Washington state. The lead time with AAI is on average 6-9 months. This means that we could be looking at bringing our new little one home at the end of 2010 or early 2011. This is much better for us.
Stay tuned....

Wow, We Have Been Bad At This

Well we sure are bad at keeping this thing up. A lot has happened in the last several weeks since we last posted. My (Scott) employer was finally purchased by AT&T Wireless. AT&T was not able to purchase 8 territories in the SouthEast US, Louisiana and Mississippi per the Dept. of Justice. These territories have to be run as a separate company until AT&T can sell them to another company. I have accepted a position to be on the Executive Management team of this company. I will be able to stay in Fort Wayne and it will keep me employed for probably another 6 months to a year. So that is positive news for us because the economy today is not a good one to be unemployed in and we definitely don't want to think about moving from Fort Wayne due to a job change.
On the adoption front we have finally received our home study. We have sent it to our agency and are awaiting instructions to begin our dossier. The bad news is that our agency recently increased the wait time to 18-24 months. This is very discouraging. We have looked at some other agencies because the wait times seem to be less. We are discussing and praying about whether or not we should switch agencies.
Everyone else in the family is doing well. We have been battling some nagging fall colds but have avoided any of the major illnesses going around. Kyle and Faith both got straight A's and very good reports from their teachers for the first grading period. Joe and Carson are just as ornary as ever.
I'll try to do better with keeping this thing up!

We're Slacking!

A great friend of ours from up north in Michigan (you know who you are) informed me that we have been slacking on this blog. She is right. This same friend did us a great favor by coming down to stay with the kids for the weekend while Tami and I got a couple of days to ourselves. We are so grateful to have friends like this. Not to mention our kids love her and her kids so they had a great weekend as well.

Tami and I did some shopping, hung out in the room and watched college football, and just relaxed. It was a great break to get our batteries recharged. It is really great to spend some time together as best friends without needing to be parents. We believe that it is ultimately good for the whole family.

On the adoption front we received the first draft of our home study. We proof read it and made some minor changes. We should be getting the finalized/notarized copy of it any day now. We have completed all of our paperwork for our agency so this will all go in together. The next step will be to build our dossier which includes being approved by the US and Ethiopian governments to adopt. We are a little frustrated with the amount of time it takes to get through the red tape but I think we have realized that our experience is no different than all other families who are going through the international adoption process.

Stay tuned as I hope to stop slacking on this blog!

Just Rolling Along...

On the adoption front we are almost done with the whole home study process. We expect that we will have our final home study write up by the end of this week. The next step will be to send it along with the 2nd part of our application to CHSFS so we can begin the dossier process. As I've stated before, the dossier process is another paper chase that ends in an official dossier that goes to Ethiopia and puts us on the list. During this paper chase we are approved by the US government to be adoptive parents and to bring a child home with us. Once the dossier reaches Ethiopia we are then approved by the government there as well.

This past weekend was almost like a late fall weekend in Northern Indiana. It was downright cold on Saturday morning at the boys' football games. Kyle's team finally got a win after an 0-3 start. Then, as a family, we did family service day through the kids' school. We went to an elderly couple's home and washed windows. It is a great opportunity to teach the kids about the importance of service and how it is linked to our faith life. The couple had baked cookies and we had a chance to sit and talk with them before we left. They think they got a lot out of it with clean windows but I know our family got even more out of the lesson of serving those in need.

Sunday we went to Tami's brother's house and brought them dinner. We wanted to see their new daughter that came home with them last week from China and our kids also love to play with their 4 boys. Their daughter is just beautiful, happy and loves to play. I (Scott) played hard with her and she just kept coming back to me laughing so that was very rewarding.

Tami and I are going away for a weekend in a couple of weeks and I am very excited about it. Things have been so busy this fall that we don't feel like we get a lot of alone time. We are going to Indy to stay in a hotel for a couple of nights and really have no plans outside of that. We just want to be able to do what we want to do and to be able to spend some quality time with just the two of us.

I hope to post soon about moving on to the next phase of this adoption!

Home Study Update

We had our first home study visit on Wednesday night. Our social worker was extremely nice and easy to work with. She told us that she will be able to get our home study written up within the next two weeks so we can finally get on to working on our dossier. Once the dossier is done then we will officially be on the waiting list.

Tami and I have to get to work on Part 2 of our agency application which goes very in depth on how we will handle typical situations that arise during the transition, how we will intetgrate the Ethiopian culture into our home, parenting plans, etc. It is very in depth and we want to have it done prior to our social worker returning to sign off on and notarize everything. We honestly have been a little lazy with it because we knew we didn't need to have it finished until the home study was done. So hopefully in a couple of weeks our social worker will return to do a little more education and sign off on everything.

On the family front we have been busy since we returned from Disney two weeks ago. This weekend Tami and the kids are going to Indianapolis to visit Tami's sister and her family. Unfortunately I can't go because I made a commitment to help a good friend with a big move. Although I am excited to help out, I hate missing a weekend with my family when we seem to be so busy through the week. I also hate that I don't get to see the Barnharts because we don't get to see them that often and we always have a good time when we are together.

Lastly, our brother and sister-in-law return from China with their daughter tonight. We have followed their blogging while in China and everything seems to be going so well. We also enjoyed spending some time with their 4 boys while they were gone. We can't wait to meet the new addition to our family!

Home Study Begins!

I finally let my frustration get out and I e-mailed our social worker to find out why it was taking so long to start the home study. Thankfully we scheduled our first home study visit for September 23rd as a result.

We have part 2 of our CHSFS application to finish up which we have been a little lazy about because we can't turn it in until our home study is done anyway.

It has been an absolutely insane week back from vacation. Football practice, meetings in the evening, trips to the grocery, Joey back to preschool, etc. We are hoping to have a somewhat quiet weekend. Kyle and Joey both have their first football games on Saturday. Tami and I have felt like we haven't seen each other since we got back from vacation. A little depressing not to be able to hang with your best friend but we will get through it like we always do.

It's Been A While

It has been a little while since I have updated the blog. On the adoption front there isn't a lot happening and that is starting to frustrate us. We have completed our on-line training and turned in all the required paperwork. For some reason Catholic Charities is just not getting the home study scheduled. We are now about 60 days into the process and they told us the homestudy would be done in 60-90 days.

We just returned from an AWESOME vacation at Disney in Orlando. We decided to do the whole Disney experience by staying at a resort and paying for an all-inclusive vacation. This can be a little costly but it was a spectacular experience. Tami saved for 6 years to help pay for most of this vacation and it was well worth it. The kids had a blast at the parks and at our resort. Tami and I had a blast just spending time with all 6 of us together and no outside world distractions. I hope to post some pictures here soon. The highlight of the trip was Faith being made over into Cinderella. She was truly treated like a princess that day.

The other good news is that Bill and Molly, Tami's Brother and his wife, are in China as I type this picking up their daughter Laikyn. They are due to be home on September 26th and we are all very excited to meet the new addition to our extended family. The pictures prove that she is a beautiful little girl. Tami and I have had time to reflect and discuss how we hope our adoption experience goes as well as theirs. Both of our families have been truly blessed! Check out their blog at www.babylaikyn.blogspot.com.

What we are learning about Africa

As we continue to read and prepare for this adoption and learn more about Ethiopia, we are learning that Ethiopia is much more than what we have always seen in the news. I think this video puts it very nicely.

Double click on the video to open it on YouTube as you can't read all the words when watching on the blog. I can't figure out how to make it all show.

An Amazing Book

I (Scott) have been reading an amazing book that is recommended during this process. It is called "There is No Me Without You" by Melissa Faye Greene. This book tells an amazing story about an amazing women in Ethiopia and her work with orphans. I would highly recommend this book to anyone and everyone, not just people who are in the adoption process.

Tami has not had the opportunity to read it yet but I will read excerpts to her now and then. Every single one of them has made her cry. I keep telling her she better have a box of Kleenex ready when she reads the book because I have only scraped the surface with what I have shared.

This book is something that all should read to get a very vivid picture of how privileged we are to live in the part of the world we do. The beautiful thing about it all is that the folks in Ethiopia have a ton of pride and joy.

On another note, we finally have our psychological evaluation tomorrow. We are also waiting on our background checks from Pennsylvania to come back. We should be ready very soon to schedule our home study meetings with our social worker and get it wrapped up so we can start work on our dossier. We'll keep you posted!

CHSFS-Helping Ethiopia

Our adoption agency, Children's Home Society and Family Services (CHSFS), is based in Minnesota and facilitates both domestic and international adoptions. One of the many reasons we chose this agency is because of the incredible support its Ethiopian program provides to the Ethiopian people. The Program is much bigger than just matching orphaned children to families. They are committed to helping the Ethiopian people and only look at adoption as a last resort. We haven't found an "adoption" agency that begins to compare to what CHSFS is doing in Ethiopia. For example, they are involved with a number of humanitarian activities such as opening schools, opening a mother and child health center, and helping poor families start their own business. Here is some more information showing what CHSFS Ethiopia is all about.

Children's Home Society and Family Services (CHSFS) Ethiopia is a US-based, non- governmental organization (NGO) dedicated to empowering individuals, families and communities in their efforts to create favorable conditions for children.

In Ethiopia, there are nearly 4.5 million orphans that need help. CHSFS-Ethiopia believes that adoption in general and inter-country adoption in particular, is the last resort. We believe that it is only when children cannot be able to survive and grow well if they stay with their birth parents or relatives that they should be adopted.

Our vision is to see an Ethiopia where poverty is alleviated and socio-economic well being of its citizens ensured. Our services: Adoption, Child Care, Family development program, Primary Health Care Training Center, Primary School in Ottoro, Primary school in Addis Ababa, and Maternal & Child Health (MCH) center

Future plans: Pediatrics Emergency Clinic (in Addis Ababa & Hosanna), High Risk Birth Mother's Place (in Hosanna), Primary School (in Mudula and Hosanna), and provision of family planning service (in Hadiya and Kambata Tembaro Zones), building complex.

Our Staff: CHSFS Ethiopia launched its work with only nine employees. It currently has created job opportunities to over 300 Ethiopians. The different sections of the organization are run by professionals. Currently, the organization has over 100 professional staff.

Nothing New

I realized we hadn't updated the blog in a while. We are doing our online study and have part 2 of the application to get started on. This part of the application gets down to some serious topics that they want us to address and also it asks us to make some parenting plans. It was really intimidating at first but I think after we realized that we have most of the experience we need after 4 kids it seems less daunting. However, it is a lot of work to get done. We also know that most of our background checks have come back to our home study agency. They are waiting for the CPS checks to come back and then we will begin the home study. Our online study, part 2 of the application and the home study are all to be submitted to our adoption agency at the same time and then we will be able to proceed with building our dossier and getting government approval.

In other family news, the kids go back to school next week and Mom is a little bummed about it. It has been a very fun summer at home so no one is ready for the school routine to start.

Kyle had his first football practice. This is his first year playing in full pads. Scott is coaching as well which is a change. It is a big time commitment but it will be a great time.

Faith finally got over her virus and turned into a new kid overnight. It was a very hard week for her and she lost 6 pounds because she couldn't eat. This is a LOT of weight to lose for a 7 year old!

Joe and Carson continue to be VERY active, energetic, sneaky, fun little boys. It never ceases to amaze us at how much energy these two guys have.

Stay tuned for more updates...

Why Ethiopia?

Here are you some things to think about in case you might be wondering "Why Ethiopia?"

• One in ten children die before their first birthday
• One in six children die before their fifth birthday
• 44% of the population of Ethiopia is under 15 years old
• 60% of children in Ethiopia are stunted because of malnutrition
• The median age in Ethiopia is 18 years
• 1.5 million people are infected with AIDS (6th highest in the world)
• 720,000 children have been orphaned by AIDS alone
• Per capita, Ethiopia receives less aid than any country in Africa
• In the 90s the population (3%) grew faster than food production (2.2%)
• Drought struck the country from 2000-2002 (first year no crops, second year no seeds, third year no animals)
• Half the children in Ethiopia will never attend school.
• 88% will never attend secondary school.
• Coffee prices (Ethiopia’s only major export) fell 40-60% from 1998-2002.
• Ethiopia’s doctor to children ratio is 1 to 24,000.
• In 1993, after 30 long years of war, Eritrea broke from Ethiopia and became an independent nation leaving Ethiopia landlocked without any major seafaring ports.
• Ethiopia has approx. 4.3 million orphans and the country is twice the size of Texas.

Faith Update

Well it turns out that Faith had a case of the Hand/Foot/Mouth virus. Attractive name, isn't it? She is still recovering nearly a week later from a mouth full of sores that hurt like crazy. Overall she has been a real trooper. Her 7th birthday is this Friday and we are going to a MercyMe concert to celebrate. This will be her and Kyle's first concert!

On the adoption front, we received Part 2 of the agency application and started our 15-20 hour on-line training module. These are great resources that are bringing a lot of issues to the surface really fast. We can already see that they will go a long way in helping us gain the skills we need to make bringing a new child into our home as easy as possible. And we are learning that no matter how prepared we are, there may be stumbling blocks that we will have to work through.

The big thing we need right now are prayers for this little one and for us to gain as much knowledge and understanding of adoption as we can during this process. And to not become overwhelmed by all of the information put forth, but rather embrace it and make it a part of who we are as parents.

Poor Faith

Faith is spending part of the week in Indianapolis with the Barnharts. They called this morning to tell us she had spiked a fever and was vomiting. I (Scott) talked to her on the phone and she just sounded miserable. I feel terrible that she is not getting to enjoy her time there because she always has so much fun.

We got confirmation from CHSFS that we are in the club. Now we have to do several hours of online tutorials and studying along with another packet of paperwork that is coming. Finally it feels like things are starting to move.

We also were told by Catholic Charities that as soon as our background checks come back we will move forward with the Home Study. Our psych eval was postponed because the psychologist was sick the day of our appt. but our Social Worker told us that we can move forward before it is done. However, we need to realize that if something is discovered that the process will stop. So again, keep your fingers crossed that we aren't found to be crazy!

I have to tell you that all of the blogs and the discussion forums have gotten addictive. I can see how all of this makes for a very long process of waiting. You read about all of these wonderful adoption stories and all of the need over in Ethiopia and you just want it to be here. Unfortunately I think it is going to be at least 18 months before we are to the end of the journey based on what I am reading. This will surely test my faith!

Random Updates

Well tomorrow we have our psychological evaluations. So for all of you who think we're crazy, keep your fingers crossed that we aren't so that this process can continue.

Scott started reading "I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla." This is one of several books recommended by the adoption agency that educates about how children of different races develop their attitudes about themselves and the world around them. It has been extremely enlightening so far.

We are anxiously awaiting confirmation from CHSFS (adoption agency) that they received our application and have accepted us. We really want to get the pre-adoptive training started so we can get closer to being on the official waiting list.

This week is extremely busy with Kyle spending a day and night at his grandma & grandpa Turnwald's house. Faith is spending most of the week in Indianapolis at the Barnharts. Scott is going to Indianapolis later in the week for work and is taking Carson to spend a day with the Barnharts. Kyle has baseball on Thursday, Friday and Saturday. So although we are anxious to get this process moving we have plenty to keep us busy.

The beginning of the Journey

Our purpose for creating this blog is to document our journey to adopt a child from Ethiopia. This blog will serve many purposes; a memoire for our family, a way to keep family and friends updated as to our progress and general news about what is going on in the Koesters family, and a way for our new addition to one day look back and see how he/she was loved by us long before we met.
So naturally the reaction thus far by those we have told is a little shock and then curiosity about what brought us to this decision. Early in our marriage and even into starting our family, we often discussed what we felt called to be. We had the idea in our heads that a calling had something to do with our careers and our "success." Thankfully God led us back to our faith life. Through our faith life and our children we realized over the period of a few years that we are in fact called to be strong Catholic Christian parents. We feel strongly that we were put on this earth to be parents, to provide a loving and secure life for our children.
We are very blessed to have four beatiful and healthy children. But through our faith life we have learned about our duty to provide for the poor, the less fortunate who can't provide for themselves. "...'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'" Matthew 25:40
Our duty as Catholic Christians combined with our call to be parents made it a natural fit for us to expand our family through adoption. We decided on Ethiopia because there aren't many places in this world that are more impoverished. Many of the orphans that come out of Ethiopia have lost one or both parents to HIV/AIDS. On the positive side, Ethiopia is a nation of great pride. They love their children and want the best for them. The decision to place a child for adoption there is based on a deep love for the child.
Our goal here is to provide a child with a life of love, family, opportunity, security and faith. We have been blessed with all of these things in our life and want to share that with a child who might not have that chance otherwise. As we say this, we realize that we will likely be more blessed by this experience and this new child than we can possibly imagine.
For any of you who are not aware, the adoption process is quite an arduous one. The government in both the US and Ethiopia will know everything there is to know about us by the time its done. So far we have applied for our Home Study with Catholic Charities and we have applied to Childrens Home Society and Family Services (CHSFS) to be our adoption agency. These are the very first steps in a long process that will ensue. Right now we are being told that the average time it takes to get a referral (AKA matched with a child) is 14 months.
In the meantime we need prayers for patience, health of our child in Ethiopia, our family and the timeliness of this process. Thank you all for your support and check back often for updates about this process and the general goings on in our family.